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About pandustar

love reading fast paced, action oriented books which takes you away from the real world

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Amsterdam

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Favourite Books

temple

Favourite Authors

matthew reilly

clive cussler

david baldacci

Favourite Quotes

to err is human, to make the same mistake again is foolish

Favourite Genres

pandustar's activity

Pay Per Heart Komal

Unavailable to read

Find Me Now Snigdha Rai

Unavailable to read

LOTUS COMPANY Y.S. Scott

Unavailable to read

Faceless Gods Sandeep Dahiya

Unavailable to read

Another Me Mishal

Unavailable to read

Thunderclap Nayab Naseer

Unavailable to read

THE DARK PERSPECTIVE Remesh

Unavailable to read

BLUE Remesh

Unavailable to read

Second Wind Sanchit Gupta

Unavailable to read

Survivors Violet Cross

Unavailable to read

Corpokshetra Deepak Kaul

Unavailable to read

RECIPROCAL Sudhansu M Nayak

Unavailable to read

Half-Naked Reality Sahil

Unavailable to read

Soul-Mates Simmer Bhatia

Unavailable to read

Killers Gaurav Bist

Unavailable to read

Seven Knocks Neha Nayak

Unavailable to read

Tyrants Khalid Mukhtar

Unavailable to read

Void Sarang Kawade

Unavailable to read

Brake Free Neha Nayak

Unavailable to read

The Only One Jyothi S.D

Unavailable to read

Wilting Tales Aviral Singh

Unavailable to read

Pay Per Heart Komal

Unavailable to read

Find Me Now Snigdha Rai

Unavailable to read

LOTUS COMPANY Y.S. Scott

Unavailable to read

Faceless Gods Sandeep Dahiya

Unavailable to read

Another Me Mishal

Unavailable to read

Thunderclap Nayab Naseer

Unavailable to read

THE DARK PERSPECTIVE Remesh

Unavailable to read

BLUE Remesh

Unavailable to read

Second Wind Sanchit Gupta

Unavailable to read

Survivors Violet Cross

Unavailable to read

Corpokshetra Deepak Kaul

Unavailable to read

RECIPROCAL Sudhansu M Nayak

Unavailable to read

Half-Naked Reality Sahil

Unavailable to read

Soul-Mates Simmer Bhatia

Unavailable to read

Killers Gaurav Bist

Unavailable to read

Seven Knocks Neha Nayak

Unavailable to read

Tyrants Khalid Mukhtar

Unavailable to read

Void Sarang Kawade

Unavailable to read

Brake Free Neha Nayak

Unavailable to read

The Only One Jyothi S.D

Unavailable to read

Wilting Tales Aviral Singh

Unavailable to read

A Story Lost in Time

pandustar

I generally hate mythos, because they are too lengthy, technical in their usage of words and characters and over just a "me too".
But your manuscript is refreshing and so fast paced, that I kept pressing the forward button, even when done, hoping for some more chapters.
I have in the past too, pointed out your flawless writing and innovative take on the story line and this is no exception.
This should be published, before it's too late and we forget what intriguing writing is all about.

Jun 16 '16
1
1

Geetha Krishnan

Thank u so much!! Keeping my fingers crossed!!

Jun 16 '16
0
We is how it should be...

pandustar

Your writing is really good, but the story line does not do justice to your abilities. I hope that this is your first book, because you can only get better from this attempt. Don't get me wrong, I really like your style, not your innovative plot, there are plenty of similar sounding stories around; unless the remaining chapters turn the story on its head.
I hope that you will try to explore some other genres as well, on the basis of your writing prowess.
All the best.

Jun 16 '16
0
1
Pay Per Heart

pandustar

I will not waste your time with a lengthy review:
1. Paragraphs seem to go on and on.
2. Story line seems predictable and like so many romantic stories out there.
3. Seems to drag on a bit

If I have not mentioned any other negatives, then you should take it as a positive.

Jun 13 '16
0
1
The Galactic Conspiracy: Truth, Lies and Pleiades

pandustar

Awesome job. It's been quite some time, since Ive read an Indian author take on the Sci -Fi genre and ace it too.
There has to be a limit to how much of Mahabharata, Ramayana and other mytho God story version can be spun and that too most are a crappy 'me too' version to say the least. But this here is a story written by someone who is not afraid to take a risk. And I think that this is a calculated risk, because the story line is intriguing, the chapters are crisp and fast paced and the writing fluent.
The only thing that you have to be wary about it that as a rule, we Indians do not enjoy or read Sci Fi. All the very best!

Jun 13 '16
0
0
An Intent Intruder

pandustar

Decent story line so far, however, needs to be edited. Also cant quite understand why certain words and sentences have been underlined.
The story is thankfully a change from the mumbo jumbo mythological crap that is being belted out by wanna be authors and sob stories put out there by the others. There exists, however, a small niche of authors like you that make reading better.

Apr 18 '16
0
2
How to Kick Your Boss!

pandustar

Nothing new about what is being said here. It reads more like a financial newspaper or magazine. One thing is for sure, you certainly know how to use the right words. It's not jargon, just a very good use of words.
Might I suggest that this entire self help story be overlooked and this changed into a fiction novel? Because you have a gift and with this story I only see a few peeks under a thick cloud cover.

Mar 02 '16
0
0
Another Me

pandustar

While the story line seems OK, in it's current form the manuscript cannot be published. To start with, there are typos, places where two words have been unintentionally joined to each other, unwanted hyphens and lack of commas. But these are things that can be changed.
What my issue is that the story line is strictly OK. Not awesome. Just OK.
There is slight character buildup, a little intrigue, but somewhere the story just doesn't seem to be heading in a way it should. It is heading at a decent pace, but not the way a sci-fi story should go.
Maybe all you need are small tweaks - or hopefully the pace picks up in the latter chapters?

Mar 02 '16
1
1

Mishal

thank you for taking the time out to review my book. Means a lot

Mar 13 '16
0
Find Me Now

pandustar

I hate romance stories, because they all have the same ingredients. However, this manuscript stands apart. For starters, it's thankfully not written keeping Indian characters in mind. I mean, just because we are Indians, do our characters need to be Indians?
The second positive trait is that although the chapters are reallllllly long, the word play is so fast and crisp that the story moves at a brisk pace. Also there is depth in the character sketch and not just an adjective used to define them.
The only negative point (and this does not affect the 5* rating) is that you should have invested some time and effort on a proper cover - but maybe that's something the publisher will have to worry.
If this book is not published, then I really don't know what people here are smoking!!
All the best!

Mar 01 '16
2
1

K.Vigneshwaran

That's Great comment Pandustar

Feb 17
0

Snigdha Rai

Thank you so much! It means a great deal to me.

Mar 01 '16
0
One Beautiful Life

pandustar

Why do self help book have to be boring and drone on and on?
This is the major issue with your book. Some of what you are saying makes sense, but you have to remember that the heavier you make your content, the more people will shy away from it.
Also - your cover is really awesome, however I hope that you spend some time editing the manuscript, even if it is just a rough one.

Feb 25 '16
0
0
Faceless Gods

pandustar

Awesome job, if you want people to doze off to sleep. The story line seems to be heading somewhere, but I have no clue where. The chapter sizes are monstrous and character details very heavy.
However, you have some real talent, if only you could flip this story into a fast paced one, I think people might actually invest their time reading the manuscript.
All the best.

Feb 25 '16
0
0
HELL WISHER

pandustar

Awesome job. Crazy plot, out of this world characters (at least the three chapter I just read) and fast pace. These are the requirements of a new age novel - and you have aced it. There are a couple of editing errors - however, baring this I feel that you should be proud of what you have done here.
On the flip side - story line seems pretty close to 'The Mine' by Arnab Ray, but I put this comment here, just because there are not many negatives in your manuscript.

Feb 25 '16
0
0
The Unvanquished

pandustar

I have begun to develop a hatred towards all mytho stories, because I personally feel that there are too many of them around. However, that being said, the one thing that attracted me to your manuscript was the size of the chapters. They are short - and trust me, that really works. Pick up any book printed in 1980's and compare them to those now and see the chapter size for yourself - they are all downsizing. So good job there.
Also since the chapters are short, the story line moves fast and does not disappoint like so many other mythos.
It's book like yours that reignite my love for mythos. Alas, you would really have to write a truck load of books to overcome all the bad ones.
All the best!

Feb 25 '16
1
2

Geetha Krishnan

Thank you so much. I am happy that someone appreciates the short chapters, because most of my friends complain about it!! Thank you once again. And I have written almost a truckload of books!!

Feb 25 '16
0
Identify Your Calling

pandustar

First of all this seems less like a book and more of some crazy professor's notes. The editing like the other notes from this professor is all over the place and in some cases even non existent. The sentences seem to drone on, sometimes with no end in sight.
But one thing that I see as a glimmer of hope is that this author has it in him to write - it is not at all easy to write self help matter.
Have you though about changing your genre to a more fast paced or intricate fiction story, perhaps?

Feb 24 '16
0
0
Weapon of Vishnu

pandustar

You sometimes come across some really weird combinations, most of which leave a bad taste in your mouth. This is just one of those weird combinations - mytho humor. But the aftertaste is pretty smooth. The manuscript need a bit of editing, however, even though the chapters are pretty long, they are fast paced and hence feel crisp. Just hope that the story manages to hold the same pace that the first three chapters have set.
All the best.

Feb 24 '16
1
1

Krishna Teja

Thanks a lot! Yes the manuscript needs a little editing which I am currently doing.

Feb 26 '16
0
An Autograph for Anjali

pandustar

Very cleverly written book. Since I don't have criticism I read the story once again and managed to find one error - The book is tagged under 'Romantic' section, when it should be a thriller only!
Apologies, but the manuscript is really well written and should be published as soon as possible.

Feb 17 '16
2
1

Sundari Venkatraman

The ebook is already published on Amazon. Also available on #KindleUnlimited. If you are a fan of paperbacks, you can buy that version here: https://notionpress.com/read/an-autograph-for-anjali

May 16 '16
0

Sundari Venkatraman

Thank you very much. Well, it can broadly be termed "Romantic Suspense" as it leans more towards romance with some suspense thrown in.

Feb 17 '16
0
RIZE: Ragnaerok

pandustar

This is Sci Fi - but not at its very best. Plenty of grammatical errors and i think a few typos too, but trust me that I understand just how difficult writing this genre can be. In that regard, it's a good attempt. But still, there are miles to go before it can be even shortlisted for publishing.

Feb 17 '16
1
1

Raj Dhoreliya

Thanks Pandu for the read, and thanks for the points.
Will work on it to make it a better offering

Mar 08 '16
0
LOTUS COMPANY

pandustar

At long last here is an author that has picked up something other than an Indian mytho or love sick thirty year old. Everything is just right with this book. The chapters are a perfect length - just good enough for quick reading in this fast paced life.
The story line is riveting. I actually kept hitting the arrow key, as I lost track that all three chapters had been exhausted.
Really, an awesome job.

Feb 17 '16
2
1

Y.S. Scott

please ask your friends to read it too. Constructive feedback will only make me a better writer

Feb 26 '16
0

Y.S. Scott

Thanks a lot. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it :)

Feb 26 '16
0
The Mystery of Bila Land

pandustar

Three chapter is not enough to gauge a book - however i see some shining stars within this manuscript. All that is left to be seen is if the remaining chapters manages to live up to the first three.
All the best.

Feb 17 '16
0
1
Choppy Waters Of Life

pandustar

My dear Devraj, have you read a book? Reading through your manuscript, it seems that you have not. I suggest you go out there and purchase a published book because this is certainly what you will not find in them:
1. Extremely lengthy chapters. You manuscript seems like a small book.
2. The word Mrs. should have a full stop after it, because Mrs is not a word - it is a short form for a longer word
3. Replies like "Hmmm". This is a sound which can be ignored. You have to write the sentence in such a way that the reader gauges what you are trying to say without actually using the word.
4. Unwanted apostrophes, dividing sentences when not actually required
This manuscript needs a lot of work if it has to get somewhere.

Feb 17 '16
0
1
Making the moment, permanent

pandustar

Was there anything good in the third chapter? I will never know since I skipped it, but reading through the first two chapter I don't think that I missed much.
Firstly, learn how to format. It doesn't take much time and effort. In fact if you are using MS Word, then the software does it for you.
Secondly, make the paragraphs shorter. Looking through miles and miles of break-less lines really turns someone off.

Feb 17 '16
1
1

Krishnayya Shenoy

Thank you for the review. If you had given anything other than 1 star, I would have been surprised. Originally, I had thought of writing the principles as a fictional story and everything I wrote would have been lapped up. I decided against it as this particular book needed to state something in direct words, without bothering about the reactions it is going to produce. The book was inside me and it has come out in the open.
I am not sure whether you had the opportunity to read the following text from the book:
This book is not meant for everyone. It is meant for those few whose lifelong search is about to materialize. For some others, it may become a starting point for a lifelong effort. Someone might find it entertaining in the sense of being helpful in spending some spare time and for the remaining people it is just something that deserves to be discarded without giving a second thought. All of that is okay. Once in a while, you can effectively use your discretion for a personally useful cause.
Thanks again, for your reading.

Feb 25 '16
0
Summons from the Creator

pandustar

This is my view and my view only. The story was awful. I really don't know what the story was supposed to convey. Boredom maybe?
Except for the cover, the rest is quite horrendous.

Feb 16 '16
1
0

Priya Sidharth Sethi

No doubt you are entitled to have an opinion, but I am amazed with your arrogance. Thanks for reading anyway.........

Feb 16 '16
0
Operation Yuvraj

pandustar

I think the good Major has put in too much reality into this manuscript. I read literally some ten names being thrown at me and forgot who they were at the end of just three chapters. What will I forget after ten chapters?

Feb 16 '16
0
0
Survivors

pandustar

Firstly, loads and loads of typos. It's really terrible when an author does care about these important things. However the story seems good so far. Fingers crossed.

Sep 07 '15
0
0
Second Wind

pandustar

Awesome job - chapters are of the optimum size, however the paragraphs can be a bit better. Also you need to re-look at the grammar or better word usage in some places. If the story carries ahead the way it has begun, you have a winner on your hands.

Sep 07 '15
0
0
BLUE

pandustar

BGB can you put in a half Star? Half Star for effort - an effort to upload something and attach your name to it. There are no positives in this story, no takeaways and I am sorry to say that I have never read such a bad book on BGB for quite sometime now. Hope that this author, either changes his genre or his writing skills.

Sep 07 '15
0
0
The Legend of Devyani

pandustar

After spending nearly twenty minutes reading through this manuscript, I still haven't understood what I've read. There are thousands of mytho - thriller books out there now, and if this were printed then it wouldn't stand a chance in the market.
I apologize as the author must has put a lot of effort into the creation, however I need to be fair and if people like me feel that the story line is rubbish, then there maybe others like me too.

Sep 07 '15
2
1

Varchaswi

There may be a thousand Mytho thrillers out there and my book might be a speck in an ocean of light. How to make my book stand out is my headache and I will see to it that it will standout. If god bless and my book finds the light of being published, I will prove that my book does stand out. This may sound like an open challenge. Yes it is. Not only will i make the book stand out but I will prove that your opinion is a jewel in my crown......Your review is appropriate to the extent that it balances any extremities in other reviews....And I do want to express something.... I respect your individuality and treasure your opinion....Literally and philosophically.......Well! Time only will tell who of us might be right..... But, If my book does not come out, then we cannot decide......... By the way, I adore your attitude......

Sep 17 '15
0

Varchaswi

Thanks a lot Pandu ji, for taking time to read thru my book. Been waiting for your opinion since long...... I hope that I can say a few words......

Sep 17 '15
0
Thunderclap

pandustar

The negatives - very boring story line and huge chapter sizes.
The Positives - good character buildup and loads of visualization.
I am divided if this should be printed or not - but looking at the other manuscripts out there, this one should not get another chance.

Sep 07 '15
0
0

pandustar

Everything is just perfect. Perfect size of the chapters, perfect intrigue, perfect characterization. Hope that this manuscript gets published - if it doesn't then its a real shame.

Sep 07 '15
1
2

Rashmi Rathi

Thank you!! Really appreciate your taking time out to read and provide feedback.

Sep 07 '15
0
Karna's Alter Ego

pandustar

Creatively it is top notch, however it is not interesting or gripping enough. To add to this, you have put in mostly everything into your summary and hence there is not much intrigue left in the remaining chapters.

Jun 24 '15
1
0

Surendra Mohanty

Thank you for reading and reviewing my novel. The interesting chapters are towards the later half of the book, though I agree that the opening chapters should also be interesting.

Jun 25 '15
0
Life's Status: it's Complicated!!!

pandustar

First of all I will not call it a book -its more of a rough draft because it is far from being labelled as a book.
Secondly I did not read the entire draft because the format just pisses you off. Bullet points, lengthy paragraphs,inverted commas where there shouldn't be any - the list is just endless
I suggest you work on the presentation and re upload this draft in six months time and hopefully people might just read the story of what it is.

Jun 24 '15
0
1
Old Monk and Vodka

pandustar

Writing is one thing but what you write should have relevance. And that just what your book has and although it is hard to decide from just these initial chapters the storyline seems to be good so far. Hope it doesn't disappoint us.
All the best

Jun 24 '15
0
0
The Blind Chase

pandustar

First of all I apologize for being so critical about your manuscript. But I hope you use this to better your writing skills
While the story might take shape in the latter chapters one thing that wont take improve is the structure or the typo.
1. It seems as if your full stop key and question mark had got stuck while typing
2. In the acknowledgement section you have mentioned your mother and father as Mr. and Mrs. respectively - reality is that if they are your parents then they would be Mr. and Mrs. and you would not have to say this.
I apologize however points like this will make or break your manuscript
3. Your cover should be self explanatory - if you have to explain what it means then you've lost the plot, because 80% of the time a book is judged by it's cover
4. Start your sentence on the next line when you finish with a narrative, that is how it's done across the world to help facilitate ease of reading.
Don't let this review bog you down. After the mandatory six months period on this website - re upload your manuscript after revising it and it will surely be in a better format to read!
All the best

May 15 '15
0
1
Nirvana In A Corporate Suit--Magical Memoir Of A Nameless Corporate Guy

pandustar

I think I need Baba's divine intervention to get me back of track here. That was one of the most heavy manuscripts I have read and I pity the reader if he/she has to read through 300 pages of this stuff. The writing could have been crisp and precise, instead it flows all over the place. These type of manuscripts may work fine with a niche audience but the majority of the readers need some masala like the Da Vinci code - no matter how improbable the story line, it needs to keep the reader coming back for more.
Also the 3rd chapter especially was a never ending torturous riot.
This being said - it's much better than some stuff I've gone through here - so all the best.

May 11 '15
0
0
Bend Your Knees & Do Your Best

pandustar

Awesome..only issue that I had is that the chapter size is quite humongous. Maybe by breaking them down the manuscript would seem much more crisper?

Apr 27 '15
1
1

Kalyani

Thank you Pandustar! Have promptly redone chapter breaks :)

May 08 '15
0
Corpokshetra

pandustar

Awesome. I am utterly speechless by this effort of yours. The thinking is really out of the box, but I feel that you have wasted your potential by putting this book on this site (apologies to the founders of this site), but what this book needs is that it is published and that too a.s.a.p
I may have been critical of your past books, however that is because the others were well lower than mediocre when compared to this.
Great Work!

Apr 21 '15
2
1

pandustar

Congrats on getting Published, a year later than what I had predicted though. All the best!

Apr 18 '16
0

Deepak Kaul

Thank you for your review. Your critique helps me improve my writing. That's the whole idea behind this website (I think!).

Apr 21 '15
0
Forty Nine Shades Confused

pandustar

Seems good, however it also seems like a to do list especially in the first chapter -also you have put some numbers in brackets. If this can be incorporated within the story itself you may have a winner, else it seems pretty drab.

Apr 16 '15
0
0

pandustar

Exxxxxxxxxxxxtremely long chapters....Really really really long. Even the paragraphs within the chapters are long....But that is as far as I can be negative.
Awesome writing. Good character buildup and the explanation of the scenes are just terrific. The first chapter describing the railway station was excellent- seemed just like I was at the station. *Applause*
I hope that this book gets published - but if not, please give it a thought to self publish it. It would be a waste if you do not do so!

Apr 06 '15
0
0

pandustar

Sheer waste of ten minutes. You need to write to an audience if you ever want your manuscript to be published. The word play was not well done - do not use words just because you know them, they have to have some context to the story line
The character build up which I felt would happen did not happen at least in these sample chapters. The story line lacks any kind of interest - play on creating some noise and you may have a winner on your hand.
All the best.

Apr 06 '15
0
0

pandustar

The manuscript certainly needs editing. The story seems to be written without keeping in mind the rules of writing. This would work if the written product would actually be presented nicely, however this falls flat. Another negative is that the characters are not built up with any flesh- they seem like just names being used to piece together the story.
The other issue is the tense. Is it past, present, future, future past??
I am thoroughly confused and I feel so will others also.

Apr 06 '15
0
0
Made in Heaven and all other Marriages

pandustar

The thing that really got me depressed was the fact that these are short stories and not a full length novel. Character and situations are well explained, so much so that I feel that you can take the plunge and write a full pledged novel piecing together all these characters and introducing newer ones.
All the best and hope to see something more from you!

Apr 06 '15
0
1

pandustar

The story line seemed fine at a glance - however the story just keeps going around and around and around and around and around and around....
Wasn't that irritating?
Well that was how your book felt. Try making it relevant and interesting because the story idea in your head has potential.
Don't let this review put you down - make use of it's negativity to improve.
All the best!

Apr 01 '15
0
0

pandustar

The book might have potential, however you need to get this edited a.s.a. p if you want to get somewhere in the publishing world:
1. Do not put bullet points within your chapter
2. Do not use corporate name unless you have permission to do so e.g you have used Standard Chartered bank. If you don't have permission and the name is used in a negative context be prepared to get sued
3. Don't use so many instances within brackets. A couple during the entire book will do - not a couple within a paragraph
4. Do not stretch words for no reason e.g wowwwwwwwwwwww and chillllllllllll - look how irritating it is when used like this.

If you have only written this story for the heck of it then you can ignore the above points - and that too these were noted while scanning your story quickly.

Apr 01 '15
0
0

pandustar

It is such a welcome change to read something from an Indian author which is not a sob or introspection story. It is a bold move to write something the way you have written - which genre does it fall into - mytho? sci-fi? thriller? its really great to keep everyone guessing. Splendid job!

Apr 01 '15
1
1

Ravi Krishnan

I would put it in the SciFi adventure genre. Thanks!

Apr 01 '15
0
Of Love and Loyalty

pandustar

I have nothing to say except that you should really think of writing some more manuscripts.
Really awesome work.

Mar 17 '15
1
1

Niyati Shinde

Thank you buddy for the generous rating and lovely review. Reviews like these keep amateur writers like me encouraged :-) Yes, am working on a few more short stories... will publish them on BGB soon...

Mar 18 '15
0

pandustar

I hope the third chapter didn't hold anything interesting since I just skipped it. I apologize for doing so, since you have put a lot of hard work into this manuscript - but I just couldn't take it anymore.

Mar 17 '15
0
0

pandustar

Sorry to say, but its a tad bit boring. Hope that the rest of the manuscript raises the intensity and that the storyline throws some curve balls along the way.

Mar 17 '15
1
1

Yamini Pustake Bhalerao

So sorry that the first three chapters failed to impress you. I will keep this in mind while penning my next. And the storyline does get intriguing as it progresses.

Mar 17 '15
1

pandustar

At the start of the manuscript I held my in despair, bu that faded away once i got past the first page. The story about eggs being used to reduce visibility is indeed a true story and I am very happy that you chose to highlight this.
One area in which you can improve could be to use common words instead of unknown words, because according to me you are trying to reach out to the common man and not the Booker or Pulitzer prize readers!
All The Best!

Mar 17 '15
1
0

Sudhansu M Nayak

Thank you for the feedback, Pandustar. Appreciate the constructive feedback. I will simplify the unknown words . Yes, you are right.:-) I am not aiming for the Pulitzer or the Booker. (Someday maybe, with the blessings and feedback of fellow co-authors and readers :-)) Thank for the warm wishes.

Mar 18 '15
0
The Second Coming

pandustar

Is this the whole manuscript? It certainly felt like that - very long chapters. Also hopefully this is not the entire manuscript as the stories seem miles apart and do not tie in with each other fluidly.
In the end, hopefully the story should tie in and make better sense.
However see how many times i have used the word 'Hopefully'?

Feb 26 '15
0
0

pandustar

This is exactly what I always say - you should be original, not in terms of the story line but the word usage. You seem to be falling into the genre which most Indian authors fall into -'the wannabe Booker Award writer'.
Dont lose heart with my review - try to stand out from the crowd. If your book ever gets published you will be sharing the space at a bookstore or digitally with thousands of other books which look like their authors have mastered the English dictionary.
It takes guts to write a story so kudos to that - and don't stop perfecting yourself.
Also didn't quite understand the use of words within the asterisks in the 1st chapter.

Feb 24 '15
0
1

pandustar

Very descriptive book. I can almost see the events unfolding in front of my eyes, really well told.
What I fail to understand is that this book has only 1% popularity after loads of positive reviews. Is this some sort of scam happening on this website where only authors with affiliation to big publishing houses are preferred. If so its very disappointing.
Jyoti, I feel you should seriously get this manuscript published.

Feb 11 '15
1
1

Jyothi S.D

Thanks for your review. I will have to wait for the committed time with BGB before I can pull it out from here and send it out to some publishers. It might never find a home but I am still proud of it :-)

Feb 12 '15
0

pandustar

It is very difficult to convey humor, because humor is something which is much more funnier when seen than read. However you have done a fabulous job, at least with the first three chapters. Hope the good work continues through the book.
One word of advise - get rid of the sentences within the brackets and put them into a proper sentence.
Good Luck.

Feb 04 '15
1
1

Remesh

Thank you Mr. Pandustar for that lovely review. I am uploading two more books soon. Please check them out too.

Jul 14 '15
0

pandustar

The story looks like the script for one of the TV shows currently on. However, the only fault I find is that this story is addictive.
Hope it gets published and also gets the recognition it deserves. All the best.

Feb 04 '15
1
0

Rajshree Chauhan

Thank you for reading, glad you liked it :-)

Feb 04 '15
0

pandustar

I don't know why I clicked on the 'Read book' option -maybe it was the really colorful and nicely done cover?
But whatever the reason the story is very well written. Reading the Preface I yawned. But after reading the very first chapter itself I would try and take that yawn back. The stories are really well written and reality based.
The one drawback I had was that the length of the chapters is too long, maybe you could have chapter breakers?
All the best.

Feb 04 '15
2
1

Vinati Sukhdev

Thank you for your insightful yet encouraging remarks - will definitely look into the preface and the length of chapters.

Feb 10 '15
0

Vinati Sukhdev

Thanks for your comments!

Feb 04 '15
0

pandustar

Really edgy stuff, something that no many conventional Indian writers would do. Keep up the good work and stay different. Remember 50 shades of grey too was a book the critics said had loads of sex in it - look how well it has done for itself.
Bottom line is that you have to enjoy what you are writing and that is exactly what II see here.
All the best

Feb 03 '15
0
0

pandustar

good storyline but you desperately need an editing job on it. If the story does not get published you can always sell this manuscript off as a movie - it has the potential to be a winner.

Feb 03 '15
0
0

pandustar

I would love to read this manuscript further as I feel there is spunk in the story line - it seems fresh and will have twists all the way I am sure.
Alas, that is where the good points stop. You have to get your work edited by a professional. I understand and hope that the manuscript is written hurriedly as the story takes place that way, however a professional approach would help considerably.
All the best

Feb 02 '15
0
0

pandustar

Thankfully here is an Indian author who has written a story not entirely based in India - I mean our stories are limited to only our peripheral vision, its like we don't know that there is a world beyond India.
The stories seem unconnected to each other - however that is what the rest of the book is for i presume.
Good Job!

Feb 02 '15
0
0

pandustar

Crisp story - even the chapters have a break within them which really works out now a days.
The only negative point I see as of now is that with a storyline as is you may have a problem with international readers as they might not be able to comprehend the same.
However, good job on the writing and keep up the good work!

Feb 02 '15
1
1

Rajiv Singh

Thanks a lot!

Feb 02 '15
0

pandustar

Extremely short chapters - but then again this is what works - most authors are too scared to change from the norm. Good story line in the little that I read - something on the lines of an Agatha Christie novel but set in India. Should be good to see who the murdered actually is.

Feb 02 '15
0
1

pandustar

I cant find any fault in the 1st three chapters so much so that I re-read the whole thing again - it is pure brilliance. Since I feel that I should put something negative (else you would not do a better job next time around) I feel that the chapters are a tad bit too long - if you could break them up I think you would have a loyal fan following.

Feb 02 '15
0
0

pandustar

The writing stand apart from others. It is refreshing and hopefully the readers will fall in love with the characters which should be mentioned in due course of the book. Good, crisp writing. Needs a bit of editing, but this should be a winner hands down.
Suggest you re look at the title - something more swashbuckling and crisp.

Feb 02 '15
0
1

pandustar

Decent - but with scope to improve. Hats off for starting off at least. Story line is a bit heavy but at least I don't have to sit with a dictionary to figure out the meaning of the words. All the best.

Jan 29 '15
1
1

Gaurav Bist

Appreciate you taking time to read this. Have a cracking w'kend bro.

Feb 13 '15
0

pandustar

The problem with people these days is that they want a book written in perfect English. It is quite OK to use a mix of English, Hindi or any other language to communicate the story. This is what I see in this book - although let me warn you that publishers will be hesitant to publish such a book as they are mostly not risk takers
That being said - be yourself which you have. The characters are very likeable. Grammar and basic writing needs to be worked upon - but then what are editors for?
All the best.

Jan 29 '15
0
1

pandustar

I fail to comprehend what the author is exactly trying to say through his stories. This is yet another case of a wannabe Indian author trying to ape the Western ones.
Too heavy for my liking; I hope that the book doesn't go beyond 150 pages, else I will have a problem recollecting who I am.
Although I have been negative about this book, this is my opinion which could be wrong and hence would like to read this further so that I hope that the narrative improves.

Jan 29 '15
0
1

pandustar

Really nice looking narrative. Hope this gets published so that people can judge if the next big thing in literature has arrived.
I like the fact that the story line is fast paced and does not dwell too long on establishing the characters. Hopefully this will be the trend across the book.
All the best

Jan 29 '15
0
0

pandustar

IF its written for children, then the story line seems good, although kids now days prefer swashbuckling wizardry to proper literature. However if written for adults, the story line seems weak. One thing is for certain, here is a writer who at least breaks away from the mold and does not use big adjectives just to prove a point.

Jan 29 '15
0
1

pandustar

Seems like these are abstract stories, maybe it gets better as it progresses? I honestly feel the narrative is good for a live play and not a book.
Good job on your part to start writing the book - and don't give up no matter how negative the comments here.

Jan 29 '15
0
1

pandustar

this falls into the category of most other Indian authors, trying to over compensate the fact that we may not be well versed with the English language.
The story has too many brand names which make it seem perfect to launch a film and get these brands integrated. Story line does not hook me at all.
However that being said, it takes a real effort to write a book and then get it published so hats off to the author. My first comment may seem harsh, however I am sure that there will be readers who will love this if published, fortunately or unfortunately it wont be me.
Keep writing though, who knows when the next Dan Brown type story may hit you.

Jan 29 '15
0
0