Survivors
Violet Cross

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6
reviews
14
reads
0
recommendations

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Synopsis

Turns out; some things are more terrifying than zombies.

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I'm a fighter.

Bullies couldn't break me in primary school.

Depression didn't finish me in high school.

Cancer did its best, but in the end, it couldn't kill me either.

The Divines? They almost did.

But I'm a fighter; I always have been.

Maybe that's why I lived through that day. The day that still haunts the dreams of every human who was 'lucky' enough to survive it.

I'm still here.

My name's Lacey Young, and I'm a survivor.

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Reviews by the community

Geetha Krishnan

A really good read. The narration was gripping and the pace is good. Definitely want to see where this one is going.

Dec 17 '15
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Shriesh Pabba

I am not a great writer, not even a published author; keep that in mind when reading my review.
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My review:
You have a voice! Believe that there is a great idea in there. I feel that the work needs to be honed a lot more before you even think of publishing.

My likes:
1. Within the first few pages, I get a sense of reading the writing of "an author". You have a voice! Here and there, you have a great play of words going on.
2. You do quite a bit of showing - makes me feel that I am "in" the story.
3. Character development is strong. I have a clear sense of who Lacey is, who Sarah is, who Plumber is, who Luke is and also a faint idea of who Layla is.
4. You already seem to know quite a number of plot devices and you are using them to good effect.

My dislikes:
1. Too many logical flaws! Just toooooo many! Here are some: Lacey is bound and in front of the enemy and being stared down -- how can she think soooo much, shouldn't there be more action?; If the rare oasis where the protagonist is in Chap 1 is so good that it survived the mysterious event, then how come there are "tell-tale sandpiles" in there? I found way too many for comfort!
2. I've read fifty pages and I still don't care about any of the characters. You have painted the characters well. However, you have not given us a strong enough reason to care for them. Sister protecting sister - that's a good start, but I think that I should have felt it more strongly for me to continue reading on.
3. There is very little telling or "descriptions". Unfortunately, I could not always imagine the setting of the scene, which made me feel a bit disconnected.
4. Mistakes in physical laws or facts were a bit discomforting in a work of science fiction. Example: Divines are made from an injection and injections don't mutate!

My review:
Like I mentioned, you have a voice. Clearly, there is quite a bit of story that has to be told. You are throwing in quite some character types - Divines, them... All of this is intriguing. What's more - your character development and "show, not tell" is also working well on a reader like me. However, there are way too many inconsistencies in setting, emotions, logical/expected reactions given circumstances... well, you really need to step back, shut this work for a few months and then revisit it; Trust me, you'll see what I am talking about. All in all, I feel that this needs a lot of work and revision before you even think of publishing. Sorry for that last statement -- I knew that it must have stung. But, I am telling it because I feel that you have a great story to tell and that you current writing might not bring that story to me.

Oct 04 '15
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pandustar

Firstly, loads and loads of typos. It's really terrible when an author does care about these important things. However the story seems good so far. Fingers crossed.

Sep 07 '15
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Dheepak Jeevaraj

The writing fails to build tension even when the situation is escalating. The language is better for most part but somehow doesn't engage the readers and leave them wanting more.
Maybe I would have been interested in this in my early teens.

Sep 02 '15
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Nita Damodar

Jul 21 '15
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Deepak Kaul

A fairly stressless read for an apocalypse scenario. There should have been more tension. There is intrigue enough around what the story is about and where it is headed.

Jul 17 '15
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