“Love gave me a very comical virtue - chastity.”
How the hell did I land up in this mess? All I wanted was for Devika to say yes to going with me to the prom. Now since I didn't have a face like Ranbir and a body like Hrithik (not to mention their fame, bank balances…), I wasn't vain enough to think I could achieve this on my lonesome. So I asked for Divine Intervention.
Of course since there is no such thing as a free lunch (exam mein 35 laane ke liye bhi 17.5 naariyal todne padte hain), I had to offer something in return. And in a moment of colossal stupidity, I came up with my own version of a Bhishma Pratigya - “I will be chaste, I will not look at another girl, I will not even think of…”
Pungi baji na? Might as well have promised to jog up and down Everest 5 times before breakfast carrying the population of Chinchpokli on my shoulders…
And to make it worse the minute I took my pledge, every basketball playing chickie on campus, every psycho rick guy with a taste for bawdy gaana bajaana, every libido stimulating hoarding, every pervy comic book artist – the entire Universe in general set out to do a Rama at Sita’s Swayamvar. Only instead of a bow, it was my chastity vow they were trying to annihilate!
As if that wasn’t enough, enter Alisha…
Who’s Alisha? Just a girl so hot, that her very sighting would cause the cerebral chips of every guy in a 500 metre radius to get so fried that they would be reduced to a state of “DUH...HOTTIE.”
And she was wanting to ‘make friendship’ with me.
Put simply boss – MERI TOH LAGNE WAALI THI!